Chief Among Them

Today's New York Times (registration required) has an article about the latest fashion in job titles. Falling out of favor is that old chestnut, vice president. It's no longer happening to be a partner. Director? That's so first quarter. To really display alpha dog status, one must now be chief.

When we started Cambium Creative, Jon and I decided to be partners first, art director and writer, second. How pedestrian of us. We should have been chiefs. In fact, it's not too late. In lieu of giving ourselves raises, we could just give ourselves multiple chiefdoms.

I think we're missing the boat, however, if we don't get a bit colorful with it. Shouldn't we give a nod to the tribal origins of the title? As long as we're inflating, let's go Fredericks-of-Hollywood inflated.

I could be Chief Runs-With-Pencils and Chief Blog-A-Lot. Jonathan could be Chief Paints-With-Running-Nose-Whiskers and Chief Web-He-Weaves.

What about Chief Run-Amok? We could run out of room on the business card.

Here's what vice-presidents look like when they don't get made chief-anything. It's enough to break your heart.